#289: Drop It Like It's Hot (Friday, July 13)

Name-dropping: the studied but seemingly casual mention of prominent persons as associates done to impress others. -Miriam Webster

As a self-diagnosed sufferer of social anxiety, it's not unusual to find me at a party, propping up the wall or observing the general ebb and flow of things from a corner. Unfortunately, those fringe locations are fertile grounds for those seeking socially awkward people like myself who would seemingly be impressed with their bragging.

Recently, I found myself the unwilling participant in a conversation with one of these name droppers. He proceeded to tell me about his frequent trips to the Hamptons, the celebrities he knew and which of their homes he'd slept in, even pulling out his phone to show me that he had a couple of their numbers--"their personal cell phone numbers"--and could call at any time.

When he finally tired of bragging long enough to ask me what I did and I told him, he promised to connect with me on LinkedIn. That night, I got an email message from him. Turns out we are in the same field and he was "between jobs" and wanted to know if I knew of any opportunities. Imagine that. All those "close" celebrity "friends" and he was still unemployed.

Needless to say, I was not inclined to introduce him to any of my contacts, because I was fearful that he would be just as obnoxious to them as he'd been to me.

Ninety percent of the time, name dropping is dispicable and makes you look like a tool. But there are a FEW times when it can actually be beneficial if done in a SUBTLE way:

Networking/Finding a Job: Use it to establish mutual relationships, or as a conversation starter. Examples: "Oh, you work at XYZ? I have a great friend--John Doe--who works there too. Do you know him?"

"It's nice to meet you, Mr. Obama. My mentor, Jane Doe, sends her regards."

Access: Get a table at a crowded restaurant or get into an exclusive club or secure a meeting with a busy executive who would otherwise have no time for you. 
"No, I'm sorry, I didn't make a reservation, but Jane said it'd be ok to just come by."
"I don't know Miss Winfrey personally, but my Gail is my godmother and she gave me this number and told me to call."
Remember, delivery is everything!