#469: Make Things Uncomfortable (Friday, December 25)

It's tough to leave comfort; it's poisonous to stay there.

It's the last Good Friday of 2015. All year we've been awesome to others...

But what about you?

How can you be awesome to yourself on an ongoing basis? Make yourself uncomfortable. Whenever things get easy or you feel like you're coasting along, think of ways to stretch yourself - to take things outside of your comfort zone.

Learn something new. Stop avoiding difficult situations. Do something you've always wanted to do.

"Discomfort is growth."

#468: Don't Be An A$$hole (Friday, December 18)

One of the best ways to be awesome to someone else is by not being a jerk. Sounds simple enough, doesn't it?

Surprisingly it's not. Many people speak without thinking, say mean things, spread gossip, aren't considerate of other people's feelings...the list is endless.

So how do you avoid being a jerk? Just put yourself (or a loved one) in someone else's shoes. Ask yourself, "Would I like someone to treat me or my loved one this way?" If the answer's no, then act accordingly.

#467: Run Your Own Race (Friday, December 11)

At this time of year, there's usually a lot of pressure to tidy things up and start the upcoming year with a clean slate. But life rarely works like that; you can't just wrap things up in a nice little bow on December 31.

This season, be awesome to yourself. Create your own timeline.

#466: Own Your S#*t! (Friday, December 4)

Few things are as frustrating as someone who is unwilling to take responsibility for their actions. Without accountability, there is no room to move forward. There is no closure. There is just limbo and bad feelings.

Be awesome to someone and acknowledge your part in a disagreement or a misunderstanding. Not only is introspection good for the soul, but it allows you and the other party to progress in a meaningful way.

#465: A Standing Ovation (Friday, November 27)

Think of yourself as a stage production. Whether you're a Broadway play, an off-Broadway play or even a one-man show at the local public theater, it takes a lot of people to get you stage ready.

The plot may change, the production may change, even the cast may change. But no matter what happens, the cast and crew are dedication to making sure you (the production) are successful.

So give your cast and crew a standing ovation. They deserve it.

#464: Let Them Walk (Friday, November 20)

#463: Aha! (Friday, November 13)

There are only a handful of times in life when you will get such clarity on your life, that it astounds you. Since these "aha" moments are so few and far between, share the lessons. You never know how it'll inspire someone else.

#462: Are You A Win Shamer? (Friday, November 6)

Have you ever been excited - really excited - about an accomplishment then you tell someone and they make you feel bad about it? These people, ladies and gentlemen, are the Win Shamers.

They're different from haters. Haters just don't want you to see you succeed, ever. The Win Shamers are unintentional - they don't mean to, but somehow they end up actually making you feel bad or apologizing for your win. You don't want to celebrate around the Win Shamers. I mean who wants to feel bad about their successes when they should be joyful?

Be awesome to someone: don't be a Win Shamer.

#461: Speak Up (Friday, October 30)

"I knew she didn't have anybody..." -Niya Kenny, on why she decided to speak up when she saw her classmate being assaulted by a police officer.

There will come a time in each person's life where all that's needed is for you to speak up on behalf of someone who doesn't have a voice.

Some people will rise to the challenge. Others will not say anything - either because they don't care or because they're fearful (of retaliation, of losing their own fortune, etc.). It's difficult to tell someone who is afraid to ignore fear and press forward, but if you're ever in the situation where fear is preventing you from speaking up, ask yourself one question: "What if this was my kid/parent/sibling/friend/loved one?"

Be awesome to someone who doesn't have a voice. Speak up!

#460: Don't Take It Personally (Friday, October 23)

Sometimes a picture says it better

Be awesome to someone by not taking it personally.

#459: Don't Use Your Inside Voice (Friday, October 16)

Being awesome to others doesn't always mean actively doing something nice. It can simply mean not doing something mean.

The thing that separates us humans from other animals is our ability to discern and choose. That means also being able to choose what thoughts we verbalize and which ones we keep inside. Sometimes people think that in order to be "real" and "honest" they need to say everything they're thinking.

There's a way to do it. Not every inner dialogue needs to be shared. Choose when to use your inside voice.

#458: Protect Your Magic or Protect Ya Neck? (Friday, October 9)

Your reputation is an external perception that others have about you. It can be managed, but not controlled.

Your magic is internal. You are magic - there's something about you that no one else can bring to this world. No one can control your magic except you.

When in doubt, be awesome to YOU and protect your magic.

#457: Are You An "A" Student? (Friday, October 2)

Anything that ANNOYS you is teaching you PATIENCE.

Anyone who ABANDONS you is teaching you how to STAND ON YOUR OWN TWO FEET.

Anything that ANGERS you is teaching you FORGIVENESS and COMPASSION.

Anything that HAS POWER OVER YOU is teaching you HOW TO TAKE BACK YOUR POWER.

Anything you FEAR is teaching you COURAGE TO OVERCOME YOUR FEAR.

Anything YOU CAN'T CONTROL is teaching you HOW TO LET GO.

Every situation, and your reaction to it, teaches you something about yourself. Be awesome to YOU - take the opportunity to introspect and learn the lesson.

#456: Sticks & Stones (Friday, September 25)

"The sunrise, of course, doesn't care if we watch it or not. It will keep on being beautiful, even if no one bothers to look at it." -Gene Amole

The old adage "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" is not true. Your words have weight and can be just as hurtful as sticks and stones.

Be awesome to others and choose your words carefully. You never know what will do irreparable damage to someone else.

#455: Be Spontaneous (Friday, September 18)

"I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar. But I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar."

Sometimes the best times occur when you least expect them, when things happen naturally and authentically. Everyone's so busy these days that it often takes weeks to plan an outing for a group.

Be awesome, reach out to a friend and just have a spontaneous meet up.

#454: Confront Your Mortality (Friday, September 11)

It's not a subject that many people like to talk about, but every once in a while, we each need to confront our mortality.

Be awesome to your loved ones: have a real, frank conversation with them about your wishes in the event that you can't make decisions for yourself. Not only will it put their minds at ease, you'll feel better too.

#453: Don't Jump! (Friday, September 4)

...to conclusions, that is. You've heard the saying about what happens when you "assume"; you create stories, make your own interpretation of innocent actions and basically see things that aren't there.

Be awesome to someone else by not jumping to conclusions, but asking questions and clarifying. You can save yourself (and others) a lot of unnecessary hurt feelings, miscommunications and grief.

#452: How I See You (Friday, August 28)

We're all guilty of being myopic and having blind spots when it comes to our own personality. Sometimes hearing how others see you can be an annoying, unwelcome thing. Sometimes it's not what we want to hear, but what we need to hear.

Other times, it's a wonderful gift. It can provide valuable insight, development opportunities, or if you're in a slump, a great boost to your self-confidence.

Be awesome to someone: tell 'em how you see them.

#451: Explore (Friday, August 21)

"The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page." -Saint Augustine

Travel is expensive. But you don't need a lot of money, or to even go far, to explore. Pick a local place - somewhere you've never been but have always been curious about or just a random place on the local map - and go.

How is this being awesome to someone else, you ask? Exploring broadens your mind and your perspectives and also makes you more open. Diversity of perspective is always a good thing. :)

Or, in the words of Mark Twain:
Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness...Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime.

#450: Embrace the Gray (Friday, August 14)

Everyone will not fit neatly into a box. Some relationships will fall into the gray area, where its undefined, uncomfortable and sometimes requires a bit more effort.

For your loved ones and friends who fall into this gray area, make more of an effort to learn who they are and to find ways that you can have a fulfilling relationship with them.

#449: Decide (Friday, August 7)

Indecision is a decision. You are deciding to let fear, fate - some force outside yourself - choose what happens next.

Indecision is crippling, not just for you, but for everyone around you who is affected by your choice.

What are you afraid of?

Trust yourself. Be confident. Take a leap of faith and decide.

And if turns out to be the "wrong" decision (if there is such a thing, because every choice we make teaches us something about ourselves) - own it, fix it and move on.

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

#448: Move On (Friday, July 31)

There are some situations that are not worth the energy it takes to keep rehashing them. Sometimes you have to know when to fold 'em and move on.

Be awesome to yourself.

#447: Don't Help (Friday, July 24)

Sometimes what you perceive as helpful to another person can actual be a hindrance. On the surface, it may appear that you're adding value but when you dig deeper you may be causing more problems than you're solving.

When you're helping someone, just check to make sure you are in fact being helpful. And if it turns out that your actions will cause more work, require more effort on their part, or doesn't make their life easier, be awesome and don't help. (It feels weird writing that. Lol.)

#446: Pay It Forward (Friday, July 17)

When someone does something nice and unexpected for you, it's very easy to pay it forward. Someone bought your coffee? Give the $4 you would have spent to someone else.

This week I saw a great video of someone anonymously donating gas to random people. Whereas most people tend to ask/tell the recipient that they're about to receive gas, this man waited until they were online then paid for their gas and started pumping it. So the recipient would get up to the window and learn that their car was already being filled. Of the people that got gas, only one person decided to pay it forward by giving the cash they would've spent on gas to another stranger to get their gas.

Be awesome, pay it forward.

#445: Hey There, Oldtimer! (Friday, July 10)

The older one gets, the lonelier it can become. Many elderly people have no one to talk to.

Be awesome to someone: engage a senior, listen to their stories. It doesn't much of your time and it can be so rewarding. They have a lot of great information to share.

#444: Tipping Is Easy (Friday, July 3)

A waiter's job is to make sure you have a great dining experience. A bus driver's job is to get you to your destination safely. You expect people to do their job and do it well, and if they don't there are usually many avenues to complain - Yelp, blast 'em on social media, speak to the manager, call 311, organize a boycott.

But for some strange reason few people use those avenues when they encounter someone who's doing an exceptional job. I've never asked to speak to the manager when I've gotten great service at a restaurant. Nor have I ever called 311 to give positive feedback. A tip is the most I've done to show my appreciation, but what about experiences where you can't leave a tip?

Make the extra effort: send a note, tell the person, talk about your experience on social media. Don't just take it for granted that they're doing their job. Everyone likes to feel appreciated and to know they've made a difference.

#443: This Is A Stick Up (Friday, June 26)

Sometimes people will take your comments/actions the wrong way. You have no control over that, but isn't it great to know that your loved ones - the people who know you best - have your back and will stick up for you?


You can also be that person for someone else. Stick up for your friends if you think they're being misjudged or wrongly accused. Be awesome and have someone's back! Loyalty is a most admirable quality.

#442: The Reverse Wolf (Friday, June 19)

Everyone's heard the story of The Boy Who Cried Wolf - he kept asking for help when he didn't need it, and when he finally needed it, no one believed him and no one came.

But the Reverse Wolf - not reaching out to someone until you need help - is just as bad. And it can be hurtful to the person on the receiving end who only hears from you when you need a favor.

So go through your contacts, and be awesome to someone who you haven't spoken to in a while. Don't wait til you need their help.

Fathers' Day is just around the corner - it's a great reason to reach out and reconnect.

#441: Fight! (Friday, June 12)

There's an old saying that anything worth having is worth fighting for. And many of us believe this to be true - except when it comes to relationships. We fight (ie, work hard) in our jobs; when we want to purchase property; when we start a business; for our beliefs and principles...but in romantic relationships, familial relationships and friendships, some of us adopt a "if it's meant to be, it'll be" approach.

Fight for what you want; for the people you want; for the relationships you want to maintain.

#440: In Case No One's Told You (Friday, June 5)

You're doing alright. It may not feel like it sometimes, but you are on the right path for you.

Do not be distracted by what others are doing, or be swayed by what others think you should be doing. Trust the choices you make, the risks you take and live your life with conviction. Appreciate even the mistakes and missteps you make along the way. They are all a part of your journey, and you can't get to the next milestone without them.

Yes, there will always be someone smarter, taller, better looking, thinner or richer than you. And sometimes it will make you feel insecure and question your place in this world. Don't. Your place in this universe is already secure. There can, and will always be, only one you. 

This is your story, write it the way you choose.

******
Now be awesome and share this message with someone who needs to hear it!

#439: Listen (Friday, May 29)

Everyone has something important to say. Everyone just wants to be heard, to feel like they matter.

And sometimes, even silence speaks volumes.

All you have to do is listen.

#438: Now (Friday, May 22)

If you're always racing to the next moment, what happens to the one you're in?

You can make plans.

You can set goals.

You can dream.

But celebrate now.

Do what you can now.

Savor what is happening now.

#437: Be Selfish (Friday, May 15)

"Care about others, but live for yourself."

Sometimes you may be tempted to fall on the sword, to do what you think is expected of you just to keep the peace or assuage the guilt or for some other reason that no one else is thinking about but you.

Fight the urge. Sometimes it pays to be selfish, to forget what is expected of you and focus on what you want. You'll live a happier, more stress-free life which will make those around you happier too.

It sounds counter-intuitive, but being selfish can mean being awesome.

#436: Tap Into Your 22 (Friday, May 8)

All this week on LinkedIn, Influencers have been reminiscing and giving advice about what they wish they'd have known when they were 22.

"I waitressed before discovering my path at age 30. Give yourself time to figure things out." -Suze Orman

"On Day 1 of my surgical rotation, I fainted at seeing blood." -Deepak Chopra

"When I was 22, I worked as a security guard at IBM." -Maynard Webb

The stories were different, but the common thread was the freedom - that feeling fearlessness, of being indestructible and having unlimited opportunities and chances to try.

Tap into your 22 on your next project, or when you feel uninspired or insecure. Just remember how you felt that day of your college graduation - powerful and invincible.

#435: Tread Lightly (Friday, May 1)

Pick your battles. 

Don't sweat the small stuff. 

Some things that appear to be unforgivable offenses are but mere trifles when examined under a different light. 

When you look back that the disagreements and misunderstandings of your life, will you be proud of how you reacted.

Every moment is a defining one, so tread lightly.

-N.L.Shompole, Kingdominthewild.com

#434: Umuganda (Friday, April 24)

Umuganda: coming together in common purpose to achieve an outcome.

In Rwanda, there is a mandatory community service day from 8:00am to 11:00am, on the last Saturday of each month called Umuganda meaning community service. The day is called umunsi w’umuganda, meaning “contribution made by the community", which is designed to be a day of contribution and building the country by citizens themselves. By law all able bodied persons above the age of 18 and below 65 are expected to participate in volunteer community work. The start of this practice goes back to colonial times and is still practiced today.

Be awesome to someone: Do something kind for someone without telling them you're going to do it, without expecting anything in return, and without promoting that you've done it - just quietly and without any fanfare.

#433: Get Off Facebook (Friday, April 17)

Facebook is great for reconnecting, but sometimes it can make one lazy and complacent. You see friends' status updates and assume you kno what's going on in their lives; or that liking a post means that you've checked in. It's easy to slowly let these Facebook connections take the place of real personal connections.

Be awesome, get off Facebook and have real conversations with your friends.

#432: How to Save A Life (Friday, April 10)

Do you have someone close to you who meets one of these criteria?

• Works too hard
• Has a family history of health issues or has told you about a previous health issue
• Doesn't seem to be themselves lately

If so, insist that they see a doctor and get them there by any means necessary. Here are some ways:

• Make an appointment for them
• Tell them they can "gift" you a doctor's visit for your birthday or upcoming holiday
• Refuse to see them until they've seen a doctor

Being awesome can possibly save a life.

#431: Guidance (Friday, April 3)

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime."


You never forget a great teacher. They open up possibilities to you that you thought were once closed.   I remember when I thought I couldn't cook and a friend literally talked me through my first meals living on my own. If it hadn't been for her I would probably still be eating Chinese food, Ramen noodles and tuna fish.

With her guidance, I built up my confidence to experiment with making meals on my own. Now I'm a great cook. ;)

The next time someone asks you for a favor, why not spend some time and walk them through it instead?

#430: "I Respectfully Disagree" (Friday, March 27)

"Friendship that insists upon agreement on all matters is not worth the name."

The titles we hold in others' lives - spouse, parent, child, friend, significant other, mentor, mentee - come with great responsibility. You have to be supportive and challenge your loved ones to grow.

Many people think that disagreement automatically means you're being unsupportive or confrontational, but sometimes it can be an awesome way to challenge someone to look at something in a new way.

Betchya never thought disagreement could be awesome? Lol.

#429: Live (Friday, March 20)

"My mother told me, 'Don't wait too long,' and I'm glad I didn't wait too long," Benmosche told Liu. "She said, 'Live your life when you're healthy enough to live it.'"

We all have parents and some of us are parents ourselves. Most parents work hard so that their kids can have opportunities they didn't.

So one of the best ways you can be awesome to your parents live voraciously. Do things, go places and experience all that life has to offer and squeeze every drop out of it. Show them that their sacrifices were worth it.

And kids learn by watching their parents, so if you're a parent, be awesome to your kids and live so they'll have a great example to follow.

#428: A Second Chance (Friday, March 13)

There are some people and situations that you need to do away with for good. There are others that maybe you did away with too quickly.

How do you decide? Sometimes life helps you make the decision - something happens that makes you realize that what you were fighting over wasn't as big a deal as you initially thought. But sometimes you have to make the decision yourself.

Give someone a second chance, before life makes the decision for you.

#427: In Lieu of Thanks (Friday, March 6)

When you're awesome to someone, they may not always appreciate, acknowledge or even remember your kindness. It may be disappointing and hurtful, and you may be tempted to discontinue future kindnesses to someone who you perceive as ungrateful. Fight the urge and be awesome anyway. Kindness is its own reward.


I've always liked this excerpt from the The Message version of the bible. It's based on Matthew 6:
1 "Be especially careful when you are trying to be good so that you don't make a performance out of it. It might be good theater, but the God who made you won't be applauding. 2 "When you do something for someone else, don't call attention to yourself. You've seen them in action, I'm sure - 'play actors' I call them - treating prayer meeting and street corner alike as a stage, acting compassionate as long as someone is watching, playing to the crowds. They get applause, true, but that's all they get. 3 When you help someone out, don't think about how it looks. 4 Just do it - quietly and unobtrusively. That's the way your God, who conceived you in love, working behind the scenes, helps you out.

#426: Share Your Story (Friday, February 27)

Every passing face on the street represents a story every bit as compelling and complicated as yours.


Sometimes you'll hear remarkable stories of courage, determination, patience, perserverance, joy, hope...and it'll inspire you to do (and be) more than what you're doing.

But what about your story? Many times, we're unwilling to talk about ourselves, but your story could be the one that makes the difference. Share it.

#425: Fall Back (Friday, February 20)

"Leaders don't create followers, they create more leaders." Tom Peters

I love this quote. It's especially great for today's social media culture where we're conditioned to think in terms of followers.

Leaders are about getting things done. They're focused, they inspire others, they achieve results. But one of the greatest things a leader can do is to fall back and allow others to step up to the plate.

Sometimes we don't know how great we are - or how great we can be - without a little nudge. If you're a natural born leader, be awesome to someone else by falling back and allowing them to take the lead.

#424: Speak from Your Heart (Friday, February 13)

"Speak from the heart and the world will listen." -Dr. Randy J. Harvey

Words are one of the most powerful tools we each have in our arsenal to impact someone else's life. Words can hurt, they can heal and they can help. Just think about your own personal situation: I'm sure you can easily recall something someone said to you that hurt your feelings, or made you feel better.

One of the simplest ways to be awesome to someone is to speak from your heart. A kind word can inspire someone, help them out of a dark place or even just put a smile on their face.

#423: Adjust Your Attitude (Friday, February 6)

"Your circumstances should never determine your attitude."

Have you ever noticed how your mood when you wake up in the morning determines the outcome of your day? The same with your attitude toward life.

Consider the story of James Robertson. Imagine if you were his colleague and had to hear him complain every single day about his lack of sleep, his aching feet and the hundreds of other things he could (justifiably) complain about.

But James Robertson didn't complain. By all accounts very few knew about his commuting situation, so he wasn't a drain of negative energy around the workplace. Now his attitude can inspire others who are in bad circumstances to think more positively about their situation. In fact, I think his positive attitude was probably instrumental in prompting many people to donate.

Have an awesome attitude and brighten someone's day.

#422: Just Do It (Friday, January 30)

"I meant to call him/her over the holidays, but things got so busy..."
"I've been meaning to check in to see if she's ok."
"I wanted to try this new restaurant, but I don't have anyone to go with."
"I want to go [insert place here], but now isn't a good time."

Y'know that thing you've been meaning to do? Just do it. For some things, the time you've spent thinking about it is the time you could've done it already.

Be awesome to yourself and just do it already.

#421: Inspire (Friday, January 23)

When you think of the people who inspire you, what do they have in common?

For me it's their authenticity; their ability to live life honestly, openly and on their own terms.

One of the most awesome things you can do in life is to inspire others. Whether it's intentionally through sharing your story (the highs and the lows) or offering encouragement to someone; or unintentionally through your energy and a living a life of purpose, you can really motivate someone to live a better life.

Be awesome, inspire someone.

#420: Be Mindful (Friday, January 16)

We all have busy, stressful lives and a lot going on. You can be awesome to someone by just being mindful of their situation. Whether it's a "thinking of you" text, or just making their lives easier by offering to help take something off their plate, being aware of others' personal trials can go a long way.

#419: A Great Recommendation (Friday, January 9)

"Personal beauty is a greater recommendation than any letter of reference."

A good word goes a long way. And while the quote is true - that those who are beautiful human beings need no letter of reference - even they can use a little help sometimes.

Know a wonderful person who could use a great recommendation? Be awesome and give one.

#418: Be Awesome to Somebody (Friday, January 2)

Happy New Year! I'm thrilled to be with you for another year! As you know, the first Friday of the year, I usually reveal the year's theme.

This year, I had a choice between two really good themes and I debated up until the last minute. My decision was made for me when I learned about a barber on Instagram who uses his one day off each week to give haircuts to the homeless. He uses the hashtag #BeAwesometoSomebody to chronicle his volunteer work.

I'm sure we're all awesome to the people in our lives. But imagine how much more awesome you could be (and to more people) with some purpose and intent behind it. I've learned that it is really the simple things that make the most impact.

How will you be awesome to someone this year? You have 52 chances.

And speaking of awesome, I ended the year with $1,378. It felt so great, I'm going to do it again - in reverse