#36: Help Resolve Conflict (Friday, September 7)

We've all been in a situation where two people we love aren't on speaking terms or are constantly fighting. Not only does it put you in the awkward position of being in the middle, you can probably also see that in most cases, the conflict is the result of a misunderstanding.

The Idea: Help resolve a conflict between two people you love. Try using these steps to help:

1. Get both people in a neutral environment together.
2. Be objective; state the situation as it is without choosing sides.
3. Allow each person time to speak without your interruption or interjections from the other party.
4. Find the commonalities in their perception of the situation and focus on those.
5. Have each person talk about how the situation made them feel, instead of throwing blame.
6. Speak about how their conflict makes you feel.
7. Find a compromise (i.e. the win-win situation) for both.
8. Have them both make a resolution and shake on it before leaving the meeting.

The Cost: Just a little of your time, objectivity and your commitment to improving the lives of those you love.

The Benefit: Resolution of conflict restores balance and harmony in the lives of those it affected. In addition, it takes much more energy and effort to fight with someone than it does to be cordial and respectful. You may not get both parties to be the best of friends, but you can get them to a mutually respectful place that is beneficial for all.